I Have a Dream!
I have a dream! Well, I had a dream. Perhaps not a dream so profound it earns the title of “I have a dream!”, but it motivated me to write a blog (which is epic in the history of GhostRunner). I have now earned my status as favorite member of GhostRunner, bringing to an end my reign as “Favorite Member Despite Never Having Written Anything”.
As for my dream, I was working with the rest of GR and Jennie Garth at a production studio-garage. We spent our days pimping rides and our nights creating comedic history.
Meanwhile, down the street there was a rival comedy-garage headed by Guillermo Diaz (I think we were working in the comedy-garage ghetto). Side note for those of you who aren’t “Weeds” connoisseurs, Guillermo Diaz is the actor who plays Guillermo, the Mexican-American drug dealer who burns down Agrestic and pushes the underworld envelope by smuggling girls and weapons through a tunnel from Tijuana (Post-spoiler spoiler alert!).
One day the rival comedy garage challenged us to a rumble. I’m a little cloudy on the details, but I know Matt carried a pipe to the fight while Evan decided he didn’t need a weapon, which is probably how it would go in real life. Actually, Matt would run rival comedy troupes down with his car, accidentally… while trying to flee.
Needless to say, the fight began with a rap-battle-style comedy off, picture the vindicating scene in “8 Mile”. Surprisingly, GhostRunner + Jennie Garth dominated and sent Guillermo Diaz and his band of neighbourhood toughs back to their garage to stick to their day jobs of spraying flames on cars with unnecessarily large spoilers and underglow (My dreams stereotype members of the ethnic community, not me!).
On the way back to the GhostRunner garage I was being a sore winner, as I tend to be. Jennie Garth turned, yelled “What the hell did you do?!” and punched out 4 of my teeth. Then she wouldn’t let me pick them up and made me leave them in the dust. I spent the rest of the night sulking with no teeth. I’ll never look at “90210.2” the same way.
It’s important to explain I believe Jennie Garth exists in my subconscious as the metaphorical GhostRunner opinion. Therefore, I write this blog in the fear that I will soon be relegated to being the GR secretary, the social equivalent of losing four of my teeth to the punch of a middle-aged, tiny blond lady. Already I am only a “non-writer” with 0 votes out of a possible 5 (In GR culture writers get a vote, having a penis gives you a vote, writing 3 blogs gives you a vote and if you are Tim, making a rule about what gives a person a vote gives you a vote).
So there you have it: my first blog brought to you by Jennie Garth, Guillermo Diaz and the GR guys saying “You better write something, we should kick you out. You are so lucky you are the girl.” Hopefully this temporarily abates all criticism and when Jennie or Guillermo Google themselves (we all do it) this blog is somewhere in the first 1000 and they star in GR videos… for free! After all, they are my inspiration.
Ps. Be gentle with me.