Archive for August, 2009

Mr Tumnus

Posted in Projects on August 27, 2009 by EAbrams
Let's get fabulous

Let's get fabulous

Remember a long long time ago? We were all in Tim’s living room, reading some bazaar script where Mr. Tumnus, a Centaur and a Minotaur were on the Dating game. They were courting some woman from the greater Seattle area who taught retards to swim, or aqua-size or something. Either way, after multiple reads it was discovered we do not have half goat man costumes, nor did we have a minotaur head, also we didn’t have the set of the Dating Game circa 1967. For that reason it will be animated.

Here is a first draft of Mr. Tumnus.

“Bachelor Number 1, I like a man who can cook, how would you make it sizzle in my kitchen.”

“I would prepare a poached mer-trout, simmered in an elder-berry wine reduction, garnished with fennel and lemon grass, paired with braised endive.”

I think he needs a hipster kafia, no?

Project Proposal – Podcasting meetings

Posted in Evan's Blog, Projects with tags , , , , , on August 24, 2009 by EAbrams

Preface: I’m a big fan of Penny Arcade. It’s a very nerdy web-comic that is superbly written and drawn. Along with this excellent product, the process that makes it is equally entertaining. That’s the point I’m most interested in. They could produce no web-comics and still have a great product in their pod-casts of making those comics. It is for that reason I propose we begin to record the GR meetings and put them on-line either in mp3 or video format.

Podcasting may increase psyonic output

Podcasting may increase psyonic output

Podcasting will  not only record many of the truly bitch-en ideas, keep terrific records for tax purposes, and give us a thing we can post regularly on the YouTube channel, but it’s actually pretty funny stuff. It’s a product we make anyway but have yet to fully capture. Think of it as a behind the scenes show within a show only real. We can of course edit out the unfunny/harmful/corporate secrets/five minutes of giggling leaving only the solid gold banter.

In summation: pod-casting is good. We should do it. I’ll even animate it if you don’t mind being represented by some really quick and dirty molar bear style graphics.

Recent Writing – August 09

Posted in Blogs, Evan's Blog with tags , , , , , on August 20, 2009 by EAbrams

This month has been light on meetings. To that end I’ve taken some time to write on some projects that are not very funny. Though that presupposes that any of my work other is funny by contrast. It’s more accurate to say these recent projects are not intended to be funny. Or perhaps that the bulk of my work is not funny and this will be no exception.

What I’ve been working on:

  • This (new) Website
  • A gritty war series featuring cute animals
  • 15 minute animation series, golden age superheros struggle with issues
  • A semi-autobio movie about Frosh week

This (new) Website

Over a few weeks I looked into many avenues for getting off of the cumbersome Joomla 1.5 site. The media managing was crass. The posting was entangled. The lag time was failing saving throws left right and centre. Are these D&D refrences for anyone but me? There were no analytics to speak of. In short, the Joomla site was holding us back. This is not to knock Joomla, but we are just not a savvy group of techies. We write scrips and articles, not code. After a lengthy trial and error process WordPress beat out Blogger and Movable Type for overall bloggability and now here we are.

Band of Beavers (or Badgers)

I saw a preview for G-Force. If you haven’t seen their ads I’ll fill you in: The US army uses animals as soldiers and has done so since carrier pigeons right through to mine defusing dolphins. This is of course a terrible pretext for a talking gerbil movie full of ethnic stereotypes and an abuse of children’s minds. Seeing it’s success I propose the following: It’s WW2 and the Allies aim to make a beachhead in Hitler’s Fortress Europe, their secret weapon against the German war machine? A  crack team of specially trained beavers (or badgers).

It would come down to a 6 webisode series. Maybe 5 minutes each tops. Really 4 minutes of content with the intro and credits. Four principal beavers in little WW2 uniforms with little guns, killing off Nazis and committing war crimes while they deal with character flaws, interpersonal conflicts, and grow together as a family till most get blown right up. To be animated in flash with a style like a much darker Happy Tree Friends. 

Just Terrific

I re-watched the Watchmen movie. I’m a big fan. It got me thinking on a hypothetical question:

“Could a super hero, who was married and had children, when divorced, retain custody of his children?”

To my best ability it seems he could not, but what a court battle that would be. Bare in mind it’s not the squeaky clean alter ego on trial here, it’s the man who upturns cars to crush villains, has a private arsenal in his garage and masked nemeses gunning for him during the off season. Not to mention the hours away from home fighting crime and the poor example of anti-social behavior as he exacts vigilante justice above and beyond the law.

This series would follow the life of Captain Terrific, a blend of Cap America and Iron man but with depression, living in a military compound and struggling though divorce proceedings, government cutbacks to his world saving operations, his idiot friends living on his couch, and the public scorn visited on super heroes, all as he tries to reconnect with his seven year old son and teen-aged daughter. Needless to say he also has layers of psychological damage from year of battle fatigue and the death of his childhood dreams at his own hands, and a defense mechanism that causes him to make terrible puns in the face of adversity using comedy like a crutch.

Example: When fighting an evil ninja scientist in a solar powered battle suit, he says, “Time to feel the impact of fossil fuels!” before crushing him into paralysis under a fuel tanker. News reporters would later show him as a wise cracking sadist.

Frosh, the Movie

This is really just an autobiographical retelling of what happened to me and my pals during frosh week. Think an Ottawa based Superbad in the first year of university: booze, broads, drugs and dirty jokes. It’ll bring back the childish insult “dick tree”, and it’s superlative, ” Cock Jungle”. Used in context: “You are not just a dick, you’re a cock jungle, you are a jungle made of cocks instead of trees”. This is an excerpt from a real conversation that happened in the real residence of 90 University at a real university. This is where frosh week gets real! Word to your Mom.

So that’s what I do when there are no meetings;  I let the mind manatees push idea balls all over the place.

Hello world!

Posted in Evan's Blog with tags , , on August 17, 2009 by EAbrams

This post represents the first post native to this site. Any posts before this one are migrated over from the “classic” Joomla site.

17 Again

Posted in Matt's Blog on August 11, 2009 by mattgr

Zac Efron is a creep. Making movies about being an unhappy 30-something year old who somehow returns to the days of high school in order to be the popular kid, wanted and desired by prepubescent teenagers everywhere, says something about your personality. Some would characterize that as “child at heart”. I would be more inclined to say “pedophile”.

But this blog isn’t a review of the chick-flicky teen/children’s movie “17 Again”, even though I probably could deconstruct every weird Freudian aspect to it. Well, maybe if I actually watched it. No, this past weekend I had my own “17 Again” experience, when I took off to Montreal and relived some earlier life memories.

The plan to go to Montreal started off when my sister’s boyfriend, let’s call him Dave, wait… that’s not a pseudonym, that’s his actual name. Dammit. Anyway, Dave calls me up and informs me THE pop-punk band of the 1990’s, Blink-182, has gotten back together after the band’s leading asshole, let’s call him Tom, decided to not be a dick and reformed the band, resulting in a reunion tour. About 8 of us decided to go to the concert in Montreal. I hadn’t seen Blink live for over 7 years, or even listened to them for about 4 years. Regardless of this small fact, I was excited to go.

Once we arrived in Montreal, we got straight to business. We had about 3 hours before the show started and wanted to be nicely hammered for the occasion. Like many other escapades, I started the night off with a healthy dose of gin. By the time we left the hotel, I was no longer fully responsible for my actions.

We showed up to the concert fashionably late. And by that I mean we missed the first act entirely. Which was fine, since we were just in time for Fall Out Boy to do their thing. Although, I spent about a third of their set at the beer stand making sure I was ‘hydrated’ for Blink.

During the intermission I met up with Tim and his wife, Marie. After some unsuccessful attempts at trying to steal her away from him, I conceded that married women are indeed tough to get, especially when the guy is 1) a friend; and 2) standing right next to her.

When Blink took the stage, I lost all control, reverting to my seventeen year old self. Except now, I’m a lot bigger and stronger and able to mosh much more effectively. This proved very useful as my sister’s boyfriend and I punched, grabbed, elbowed, and tickled our way up to the front. That’s right: Tickled.

The experience was fairly amazing as a Pavlovian effect took over and I screamed out lyrics to songs long forgotten. The show itself was pretty damn good. And for my troubles at the front, I got a hat that was thrown into the crowd and a bottle of water from the bouncer for free. Not bad considering all some people get is a ripped shirt, broken glasses and a punch to the chops. Yes, being seventeen again was fun. Even without Zac Efron’s fantasy of high school girls. Creep.